Tuesday, October 5, 2010

LIFE CHANGING NEWS--To GOD be the glory!

Then the word of the LORD came to me, saying:
       “ Before I formed you in the womb I knew you;
      Before you were born I sanctified you;
(Jeremiah 1:4-5a, NKJV)

Some of you know and some of you are finding out for the first time that Seth and I have been trying to start a family for quite some time.  We have been married for over nine years and have not conceived.  I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) in November of 2009.  Apparently, I have had this condition all of my life, but no doctor ever gave me a proper diagnosis.  Basically, I don't ovulate on a regular basis.  In fact, my cycles have always wildly varied, being completely unpredictable.  I might have a regular cycle for a couple months then not have one for eight or nine months, have two in one month, then skip four months, etc.  Basically there's no discernable pattern for my fertility and ovulation.

Beginning in January of 2010, we started fertility treatments.  Each cycle, the treatments became more intense and much more invasive.  I had to have daily intramuscular injections (with a 2 inch needle) in addition to a variety of meds.  It didn't work.  At times our doctor would tell us that there was no hope for us without treatment.  Then he told us that they would only do six rounds of treatment before they figured there must be something else wrong with me that they cannot help and that I would be on my own.

My last round of treatment was in May 2010.  It, too, was unsuccessful.  However, because of the strength of the medication, my ovaries became greatly enlarged and I began showing symptoms of ovarian torsion.  My secondary doctor was gravely concerned that I might lose one or both ovaries and if they ruptured, it could result in death.  Thankfully, I did not lose either ovary.  I had a lot of pain, but praise God...I'm still here.

Throughout this journey it has been an emotional roller coaster to say the least.  We've had highs and we've had the deepest of lows.  I learned that the most comforting thing anyone can say to someone going through this is, "I don't know what to say, but I'm praying for you."  The truth is that sometimes God does not give you the desires of your heart--sometimes He changes your desires.  God is hope, but sometimes what we desire is not what He desires.

We never lost hope.  We clung to God above all and searched Him deeply because we wanted His will.  And if it was His will for us not to have children, we would be okay with that.  If He wanted us to adopt, wonderful!  We just wanted to know what His will was and to be obedient to it.  We've been through enough with Him to know that His will really is perfect and better than ours.


He definitely revealed His will in a most surprising way.

We are now pregnant.

Without any medical assistance.

God has blessed us beyond our expectations.  We have a single pregnancy with an estimated due date of April 13, 2011.  As of today, we are 12 weeks, 6 days along and the baby is perfectly healthy, growing on target, and has a strong heartbeat.

We always knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that if we became pregnant with or without medical assistance that it was only because of God.

People have told us that God blessed us with this child when we stopped medication so that we'd know it was Him.  But, we always knew that it would have to be Him.  Medicine can fertilize an egg, but can't make it stick.  They can't force something that God has not ordained.

Clearly, this was God's timing.

We have prayed all along that God would be glorified through this.  He is the one who brings the increase.  God alone knows each of us better than we know ourselves and knew each of us before we were even in our mothers' wombs.  And He knows this precious blessing.

This is His child.

We are humbled and honored to be considered worthy to be his or her parents--stewards here on earth.

I admit--this pregnancy has been rough, really rough. My immunity is at an all time low.  I've had migraines, days-long headaches, vomiting, dry heaves, food poisoning, a major case of gastroenteritis which landed me in the ER hooked up to an IV, and have had severe food and smell aversions.  I've had a difficult time sleeping, resorting to sleeping on the couch and floor to avoid any movements that could send me running to the bathroom.

STILL, it is all worth it and I count it a blessing.  Thank you O God my Father!

Now, for the pictures.

This is our first ultrasound scan, done on August 20th.

Here is our second scan from September 8th.

And here is today's scan.  It's hard to make out in the picture, but the baby is curled up in the fetal position and looks like a regular baby.  It's about the size of a small peach right now.

O Lord, we stand in utter awe of You.  We are totally humbled and surrendered to You.  We do not deserve this blessing, but we are ever thankful that You esteemed us enough to entrust this child to us.  We commit this child to You and continue to ask for Your wisdom and discernment as we enter this new chapter in our lives.  Bless You, Father.  Thank you Jesus.  We pray in Jesus' glorious name.  Amen.


  1. Praise God in the Highest for He is good! He is good, He is very good!